The Truth Behind Today’s Country Music Lyrics

Hello to you all.

This morning, while watching GAC – after convincing Mother that starting the day off watching the news was in no way a good idea – I made a stark realization about the lyrics that were coming out of these people’s perfectly-veneered mouths: “Eh”.

tswift

I mean, I like it. I really like it. I listen to it alll the time. And I hold single-person dance parties on the daily. But if you know me, you know that I am generally obsessed with about 98% of the musical genres out there. Hard metal and tacky rock included (you can thank big brother and PapaBear for that one).

As a songwriter and apparent drama queen (or so I’ve been told), I can assure you that the words/sentences/ridiculous-analogies are just there to make the beat work. They don’t actually speak the truth. Well, they do, but things could be a lot more simpler if the words didn’t have to rhyme.

Lyrics can say a lot about a person. And here is a list of translations from today’s country music:

I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling 22 – “Crap. Adult-hood is almost here. Better get it all out of my system now.”

I’m a redneck woman, and I ain’t no high-class broad  – “I wear my pajamas to Wal-Mart and strapless dresses with non-strapless bras.”

And I don’t even know my last name – “I know there are more important things, but how will I ever show proper identification?”

God is great. Beer is good. And people are crazy – I honestly can’t really argue with this. Rock on, Billy.

And hold on tight cause it’s gonna be wilder than any eight second ride – “I better use a rodeo analogy so people know I’m a cowboy. I can’t wait to take a good dip at the end of this song.”

Run and hide your crazy and start acting like a lady -“Granny is on her way over. Better shape up.”

Behind every woman’s scorn is a man who made her that way -“I’m a woman and I hold grudges until the end of time. Get used to it.”

Shake it for me girl -“I couldn’t think of any other words that rhymed so  I decided to repeat the same slightly tacky phrase over and over and relate it to all things nature because I’m a country boy! I can’t wait to take a good dip at the end of this song.”

Sunny and 75 – “I know 75 is way too cold for the beach and a bikini, but 95 didn’t fit as well.”

And my favorite….

Drive me redneck crazy – “Didn’t you all know that Redneck Crazy is a lot more detrimental than regular crazy? Because it so is.”

 

Have a lovely day!

 

K-Rae Cmajdizzle

(Thought I’d use my musical name [for when I become a rap goddess].)

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